Musing for the day - 31/Oct

Talk is cheap, otherwise I can't afford it.

Judge not least ye be judged

Some people have too much energy focused on the wrong matters. This is my personal and humble opinion. Picture this: A group of divers come together with a professed love for the sport i.e. Scuba-diving. An online-forum, few meetings and the friendship bond forms like nothing can break it up. Wrong! Give or take a few months later, bad-mouthing starts and negative opinions form. Talk evolves to everything other than diving. Persons who used to talk sense now show different colors. Of course everyone is entitled to their own opinion. However, opinions formed from hearing one side of the story are not balanced nor fair. Opinions are also easily swayed by many factors and often biased. These opinions soon become judgements and from there comes the self-appointed executioners.

So much mention of parasites, feeding off host and the entire works. Talking about themselves I would think. Like it or not, the human-race is of a parasitic nature with some more potent than others. Feeding & thriving on negative vibes, creating havoc where none so the feast can continue.


Addendum: Argue not with fools, least none can tell the difference.

The World According To Student Bloopers

THE WORLD ACCORDING TO STUDENT BLOOPERS
Richard Lederer
St. Paul's School
(Reprinted Without Permission)

One of the fringe benefits of being an English or History teacher is receiving the occasional Jewel of a student blooper in an essay. I have pasted together the following "history" of the world from certifiably genuine student bloopers collected by teachers throughout the United States, from eighth grade through college level. Read carefully, and you will learn a lot.

The inhabitants of Egypt were called mummies. They lived in the Sarah Dessert and traveled by Camelot. The climate of the Sarah is such that the inhabitants have to live elsewhere, so certain areas of the dessert are cultivated by irritation. The Egyptians built the pyramids in the shape of a huge triangular cube. The Pramids are a range of mountains between France and Spain.

The Bible is full of interesting caricatures. In the first book of the Bible, Guinesses, Adam and Eve were created from an apple tree. One of their children, Cain, asked "Am I my brother's son?" God asked Abraham to sacrifice Issac on Mount Montezuma. Jacob, son of Issac, stole his brother's birthmark. Jacob was a partiarch who brought up his twelve sons to be partiarchs, but they did not take to it. One of Jacob's sons, Joseph, gave refuse to the Israelites.

Pharaoh forced the Hebrew slaves to make bread without straw. Moses led them to the Red Sea, where they made unleavened bread, which is bread made without ingredients. Afterwards, Moses went up on Mount Cyanide to get the ten commandments. David was a Hebrew king skilled at playing the liar. He fought with the Philatelists, a race of people who lived in biblical times. Solomon, one of David's sons, had 500 wives and 500 porcupines.

Without the Greeks, we wouldn't have history. The Greeks invented three kinds of columns-- Corinthian, Doric, and Ironic. They also had myths. A myth is a female moth. One myth says that the mother of Achilles dipped him in the River Stynx until he because intolerable. Achilles appears in "The Illiad," by Homer. Homer also wrote the "Oddity," in which Penelope was the last hardship that Ulysses endured on his journey. Actually, Homer was not written by Homer but by another man of that name.

Socrates was a famous Greek teacher who went around giving people advice. They killed him. Socrates died from an overdose of Wedlock.

In the Olympic Games, Greeks ran races, jumped, hurled the biscuits, and threw the java. The reward to the victor was a coral wreath. The government of Athen was democratic because the people took the law into their own hands. There were no wars in Greece, as the mountains were so high that they couldn't climb over to see what their neighbors were doing. When they fought the Parisians, the Greeks were outnumbered because the Persians had more men.

Eventually, the Ramons conquered the Geeks History call people Romans because they never stayed in one place for very long. At Roman banquets, the guests wore garlic in their hair. Julius Caesar extinguished himself on the battle fields of Gaul. The Ides of March killed him because they thought he was going to be made king. Nero was a cruel tyrany who would torture his poor subjects by playing the fiddle to them.

Then came the Middle Ages. King Alfred conquered the Dames, King Arthur lived ln the Age of Shivery, King Harlod mustarded his troops before the Battle of Hastings, Joan of Arc was cannonized by George Bernard Shaw, and the victims of the Black Death grew boobs on their necks Finally, the Magna Carta provided that no free man should be hanged twice for the same offence.

In midevil times most of the people were alliterate. The greatest writer of the time was Chaucer, who wrote many poems and verse and also wrote literature. Another tale tells of William Tell, who shot an arrow through an apple while standing on his son's head.
The Renaissance was an age in which more individuals felt the value of their human being. Martin Luther was nailed to the church door at Wittenberg for selling papal indulgences. He died a horrible death, being excommunicated by a bull. It was the painter Donatello's interest in the female nude that made him the father of the Renaissance. It was an age of great inventions and discoveries. Gutenberg invented the Bible. Sir Walter Raleigh is a historical figure because he invented cigarettes. Another important invention was the circulation of blood. Sir Francis Drake circumcised the world with a 100-foot clipper.

The government of England was a limited mockery. Henry VIII found walking difficult because he had an abbess on his knee. Queen Elizabeth was the "Virgin Queen." As a queen she was a success. When Elizabeth exposed herself before her troops, they all shouted "hurrah." Then her navy went out and defeated the Spanish Armadillo.

The greatest writer of the Renaissance was William Shakespear. Shakespear never made much money and is famous only because of his plays. He lived in Windsor with his merry wives, writing tragedies, comedies and errors. In one of Shakespear's famous plays, Hamlet rations out his situation by relieving himself in a long sololiquy. In another, Lady Macbeth tries to convince Macbeth to kill the King by attacking his manhood, Romeo and Juliet are an expample of a heroic couplet. Writing at the same time as Shakespear was Miquel Cervantes. He wrote "Donkey Hote." The next great author was John Milton. Milton wrote "Paradise Lost." Then his wife dies and he wrote "Paradise Regained."

During the Renaissance America began. Christopher Columbus was a great navigator who discovered America while cursing about the Atlantic. His ships were called the Nina, the Pinta, and the Santa Fe. Later the Pilgrims crossed the Ocean, and that was called the Pilgrim's Progress. When they landed at Plymouth Rock, they were greeted by Indians, who came down the hill rolling their war hoops before them. The Indian squabs carried porposies on their back. Many of the Indian heroes were killed, along with their cabooses, which proved very fatal to them. The winter of 1620 was a hard one for the settlers. Many people died and many babies were born. Captain John Smith was responsible for all this.

One of the causes of the Revolutionary Wars was the English put tacks in their tea. Also, the colonists would send their pacels through the post without stamps. During the War, Red Coats and Paul Revere was throwing balls over stone walls. The dogs were barking and the peacocks crowing. Finally, the colonists won the War and no longer had to pay for taxis.

Delegates from the original thirteen states formed the Contented Congress. Thomas Jefferson, a Virgin, and Benjamin Franklin were two singers of the Declaration of Independence. Franklin had gone to Boston carrying all his clothes in his pocket and a loaf of bread under each arm. He invented electricity by rubbing two cats backwards and declared "a horse divided against itself cannot stand." Franklin died in 1790 and is still dead.

George Washington married Matha Curtis and in due time because the Father of our Country. Them the Constitution of the United States was adopted to secure domestic hostility. Under the Constitution the people enjoyed the right to keep bare arms.

Abraham Lincoln became America's greatest Precedent. Lincoln's mother died in infancy, and he was born in a log cabin which he built with his own hands. When Lincoln was President, he wore only a tall silk hat. He said, "In onion there is strength " Abraham Lincoln write the Gettysburg address while traveling from Washington to Gettysburg on the back of an envelope. He also signed the emasculation proclamation, and the Fourteenth Amendment gave the ex-Negroes citizenship. But the Clue Clux Clan would torcher and lynch the ex-Negroes and other innocent victims. On the night of April 14, 1865, Lincoln went to the theater and got shot in his seat by one of the actors in a moving picture show. This believed assinator was John Wilkes Booth, a supposedly insane actor. This ruined Booth's career.

Meanwhile in Europe, the enlightenment was a reasonable time. Voltare invented electricity and also wrote a book called "Candy." Gravity was invented by Issac Walton. It is chiefly noticeable in the Autumn, when the apples are falling off the trees.

Bach was the most famous composer in the world, and so was Handel. Handel was half German, half Italian and half English. He was very large. Bach died from 1750 to the present. Beethovan wrote music even though he was deaf. He was so deaf he wrote loud music. He took long walks in the forest even when everyone was calling for him. Beethoven expired in 1827 and later died for this.

France was in a very serious state. The French Revolution was accomplished before it happened. The Marseillaise was the theme song of the French Revolution, and it catapulted into Napoleon. During the Napoleonic Wars, the crowned heads of Europe were trembling in their shoes. Then the Spanish gorrilas came down from the hills and nipped at Napoleon's flanks. Napoleon became ill with bladder problems and was very tense and unrestrained. He wanted an heir to inheret his power, but since Josephine was a baroness, she couldn't bear him any children.

The sun never set on the British Empire because the British Empire is in the East and the sun sets in the West. Queen Victoria was the longest queen. She sat on a thorn for 63 years. He reclining years and finally the end of her life were exemplatory of a great personality. Her death was the final event which ended her reign.

The nineteenth century was a time of many great inventions and thoughts. The invention of the steamboat caused a network of rivers to spring up. Cyrus McCormick invented the McCormick Raper, which did the work of a hundred men. Samuel Morse invented a code for telepathy. Louis Pastuer discovered a cure for rabbis. Charles Darwin was a naturalist who wrote the "Organ of the Species." Madman Curie discovered radium. And Karl Marx became one of the Marx Brothers.

The First World War, cause by the assignation of the Arch-Duk by a surf, ushered in a new error in the anals of human history.

Hello ...

What does one mean when they say "hello"?

H = How are you?
E = Everything all right?
L = Like to hear from you.
L = Love to see you soon!
O = Obviously, I miss you...

** Shamelessly copied from a chain-email.

One That Got Away

A test for the EOS-350D. As I was going out this evening for dinner, there was a noise of something moving just 2 meters from where I was standing. At first, I thought it was a cat. I was right, in a way but it was more than that. It was a Civet Cat (Musang)! Ran in to get my camera but I guess it was not comfortable with sudden attention and started to make its way across the balcony to my neighbour's house. Perhaps it was on its way there anyway as one of its favourites was grown next door i.e. Jambu Air (don't know the translation for this fruit).

The neighbour was pretty excited over it as well and welcomed me to try to shoot the picture from his garden. The creature was amongst the leaves and the camera autofocus just could not lock on due to the poor lighting conditions.

Anyway, to cut the story short, it decided it had enough excitement and left the scene via the rooftop. It'll be back.

If I Only Could

If it was within my power, the sun would not have risen today until you had allowed the night to pass.

7 October 1964

That was when I was born. I'm 41 today. How the years fly by without realizing it. No greeting cards but I had a trickling of well wishes from family and friends that made me feel good. It always feels good to be remembered except when you missed a payment with your creditors. A contrast to days of young when birthdays means presents from parents and friends, birthday cakes and feeling delighted with each increase in the number of candles. The thrill of ripping open packages while wondering whether its 'the present' you had wished for. But nothing beats a gift from the special someone you love. It does not matter what it is, it is special, so very special. My special gift this year was a Swiss knife and time with the person who gave it.

42, here I come.

The World As The Lens See It

The itch has become unbearable. The mind is focused on it. Plans have been laid and the game's afoot.... Welcome the Canon EOS-350D.... YEEEESSS!!!!!

I have finally reentered the realm of the SLR (Single Lens Reflex) Camera but no longer with the 35mm film. The realm of digitals have long poised to take over but the price of a digital SLR is still steep although it has come down a long way. My Canon EOS-50 35mm SLR had been long neglected in favour of the digitals i.e. Sony P1 (3MP) and Nikon CP5000 (5MP) but these had limits as for creative & action photography. Only another SLR would be able to fulfill the functionality of an SLR.

Now, to find the space needed to store 8 megapixel pictures :P

Why Bali?!

Saturday 1st, October 2005. Three bombs rocked the peaceful island of Bali, in Jimbaran and Kuta. The people and economy are just beginning to be recover from the senseless and brutal bombing not 2 years ago in the Kuta district. The future of the world looks bleak with man's inhumanity to fellow man.

Having visited Bali earlier this year in May and having emersed in the beautiful and peaceful heritage, my heart cries for the thousands of Balinese who will have to endure further hardship that looms ahead. No tourist means no income to buy food to feed their family.

Shame will befall those that were responsible
The blood of the innocent will burn in their hearts
The cries of hungry children will haunt their dreams
There will be no silence for the curses will howl in their ears
What will they answer when God questions "Why?"

Bali will recover. The people are resilient. The world will not cow to despicable acts of violence. Justice will eventually prevail.