The Journey West

No diciples, no dragon horse, no long journey (meaning by count of months or years) and no, not going looking for the Western Heaven Monestery (not sure if I got the translation right) and definately no, not getting the Buddhist Sutras.

Just a simple trip and hopefully get to broaden my horizons of the world beyond the boaders of my country. And take lots, and lots of pictures.

Missing friends

I miss some of my friends. One just SMS'd me and this simple gesture brings me joy. We have kept in touch one way or another for the past 11 years. Some I have not heard from for a long time and wonder if they do remember me at all.

Addendum - 01Dec2005
Oh Joy! Received an email from another friend that I have not heard from for some time. He has been through some tough times since the tsunami hit Thailand almost a year ago. I am glad he and his family were ok.

Crash!!!

The dreaded happened... my office PC Harddisk Drive crashed last week. Can't say I was not warned. There were signs that it might happen. Ah well, it was a forced way to clean up old data. I'm not a good housekeeper so the HDD is so choked full of data that I didn't even recall existed. What peeved me was it took the stupid outsourcing company one whole week to attend to the matter. How "cacat" (handicapped) can they be.

I even reported to their helpdesk that it was a HDD crash and their field engineer shows up a week later to tell me what I already reported and left saying it was not within his scope of work. Need the hardware technician to change the HDD. Hello!? Duh!!!

Past, Present and Future Tensed

To live today, we have to leave the past
To live tomorrow, we have to remember the past

We have heard these words mentioned in so many ways and it has always been the case of easier said than done. Why do we have this tendency to cling on so tightly to the past even though it drags us down. We thought we carry gold so we struggle to stay afloat. Only when we realize that the burden of the past is naught but fool's gold, will we let go. When do we start to realize is the question. Before it is too late or will we let go before it drowns us.

Grinding Monday Blues

In retrospect, a break is never long enough and the recent one is no exception. Was not sure if I could have another sleep-in and had to check the date while hoping that it is not yet Monday 7/11. Too bad I was right about the date. Just the mere thought of having to go back to the daily grind is enough to drain my energy. Psychological? Yes, and it works! Traffic is not back to its usual density yet as most folks have opted off for an additional day or so.

Looking back, it was late nights because can afford to sleep in the next day. Then its wondering where to go and what to do. Managed to do some photo-shoots with friends and discover what's in our 'back-yard' while at it. Back-yard meaning within 50km radius from the city-limits.

Was nice while it lasted. The city air was so clear on Friday. Majority of cars are outstation spouting polluting away from the Klang Valley. Heard horror traffic reports on Sat & Sun as the masses pouring back into the city. Glad I'm not one of them ... smarter idea to stay put and enjoy the 'empty' roads.

Next Four Days Are Off!!

It is the eve of the Raya holidays and most people have left Klang Valley for their 'kampungs'. Even Sunday morning traffic is not this light. Times like this you wish for it to be the norm instead of being choked with other drivers that seem all strung up even before the day has begun.

Out in the Puduraya area, last minute rushes for buses heading out of the city. Expect majority to be out by tonight.

Office is very quiet too. On my floor there are only a handful, perhaps only a quarter of the usual workforce. Nice with the absence of phones ringing, voices both loud and louder. Better not get used to it.

Why is a ship called a 'SHE'?

• A ship is always called a 'She' because there is always a great deal of bustle around her
  
• There is usually a gang of men about, she has a waist and stays
  
• It takes a lot of paint to keep her good-looking
  
• It is not the initial expense that breaks you, it is the upkeep
  
• She can be all decked out
  
• It takes an experienced man to handle her correctly, and without a man at the helm, she is uncontrollable.
  
• She shows her top sides, hides her bottom and, when coming into port, always heads for the buoys!

The Crazy English Language

Condensed from "crazy english" by Richard Lederer.

English is the most widely used language in the history of our planet. One in every seven human beings can speak it. More than half of the world's books and three-quarters of the international mail are in English. Of all languages, English has the largest vocabulary - perhaps as many as two million words and one of the noblest bodies of literature.

Nonetheless, let's face it: English is a crazy language. There is no egg in eggplant, neither pine nor apple in pineapple, and no ham in a hamburger. English muffins weren't invented in England or french fries in France. Sweetmeats are candy while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat.

We take English for granted. But when we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square, and a guinea pig is neither a pig nor from Guinea. And why is it a writer writes, but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce, and hammers don't ham? If the plural of tooth is teeth, shouldn't the plural of booth be beeth? One goose, two geese - so one moose, two meese? One index, two indices - one Kleenex, two Kleenices?

Doesn't it seem loopy that you can make amends but not just one amend, that you can comb through the annals of history but not just one annal? If you have a bunch of odds and ends and you get rid of all but one, what do you call it?

If the teacher taught, why isn't it true that the preacher praught? If a horsehair mat is made from the hair of horses and a camel's-hair coat from the hair of camels, from what is a mohair coat made? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? If you wrote a letter, perhaps you also bote your tongue?

Sometimes I wonder if all English speakers should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane. In what other language do people drive on a parkway and park in a driveway? Recite at a play and play at a recital? Ship by truck and send cargo by ship? Have noses that run and feet that smell?

How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites? How can overlook and oversee be opposites, while quite a lot and quite a few are alike? How can the weather be as hot as hell one day and cold as hell the next?

Did you ever notice that we talk about certain things only when they are absent? Have you ever seen a horseful carriage or strapful gown, met a sung hero or experienced requited love? Have you ever run into someone who was combobulated, gruntled, ruly or peccable?

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out and in which your alarm clock goes off by going on.

English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race (which, of course, isn't really a race at all). That is why, when the stars are out they are visible, but when the lights are out they are invisible. And why, when I wind up my watch I start it, but when I wind up this essay I end it.


Addendum: In US men who ride on horses are sometimes called cowboys, pumps a liquid into their automobiles, but call it gas. Runs around with a ball in their hands and call it football, play with a hard ball and call it softball. People with blonde, brown, auburn, brunette or red hair, have blue, brown eyes and white skin call people with black hair, black eyes and black skin “colored”. Men boil water to make it hot, put ice in it to make it cold, lemon in it to make it sour, sugar to make it sweet and say “here’s to you” and drink it themselves.

Musing for the day - 31/Oct

Talk is cheap, otherwise I can't afford it.

Judge not least ye be judged

Some people have too much energy focused on the wrong matters. This is my personal and humble opinion. Picture this: A group of divers come together with a professed love for the sport i.e. Scuba-diving. An online-forum, few meetings and the friendship bond forms like nothing can break it up. Wrong! Give or take a few months later, bad-mouthing starts and negative opinions form. Talk evolves to everything other than diving. Persons who used to talk sense now show different colors. Of course everyone is entitled to their own opinion. However, opinions formed from hearing one side of the story are not balanced nor fair. Opinions are also easily swayed by many factors and often biased. These opinions soon become judgements and from there comes the self-appointed executioners.

So much mention of parasites, feeding off host and the entire works. Talking about themselves I would think. Like it or not, the human-race is of a parasitic nature with some more potent than others. Feeding & thriving on negative vibes, creating havoc where none so the feast can continue.


Addendum: Argue not with fools, least none can tell the difference.

The World According To Student Bloopers

THE WORLD ACCORDING TO STUDENT BLOOPERS
Richard Lederer
St. Paul's School
(Reprinted Without Permission)

One of the fringe benefits of being an English or History teacher is receiving the occasional Jewel of a student blooper in an essay. I have pasted together the following "history" of the world from certifiably genuine student bloopers collected by teachers throughout the United States, from eighth grade through college level. Read carefully, and you will learn a lot.

The inhabitants of Egypt were called mummies. They lived in the Sarah Dessert and traveled by Camelot. The climate of the Sarah is such that the inhabitants have to live elsewhere, so certain areas of the dessert are cultivated by irritation. The Egyptians built the pyramids in the shape of a huge triangular cube. The Pramids are a range of mountains between France and Spain.

The Bible is full of interesting caricatures. In the first book of the Bible, Guinesses, Adam and Eve were created from an apple tree. One of their children, Cain, asked "Am I my brother's son?" God asked Abraham to sacrifice Issac on Mount Montezuma. Jacob, son of Issac, stole his brother's birthmark. Jacob was a partiarch who brought up his twelve sons to be partiarchs, but they did not take to it. One of Jacob's sons, Joseph, gave refuse to the Israelites.

Pharaoh forced the Hebrew slaves to make bread without straw. Moses led them to the Red Sea, where they made unleavened bread, which is bread made without ingredients. Afterwards, Moses went up on Mount Cyanide to get the ten commandments. David was a Hebrew king skilled at playing the liar. He fought with the Philatelists, a race of people who lived in biblical times. Solomon, one of David's sons, had 500 wives and 500 porcupines.

Without the Greeks, we wouldn't have history. The Greeks invented three kinds of columns-- Corinthian, Doric, and Ironic. They also had myths. A myth is a female moth. One myth says that the mother of Achilles dipped him in the River Stynx until he because intolerable. Achilles appears in "The Illiad," by Homer. Homer also wrote the "Oddity," in which Penelope was the last hardship that Ulysses endured on his journey. Actually, Homer was not written by Homer but by another man of that name.

Socrates was a famous Greek teacher who went around giving people advice. They killed him. Socrates died from an overdose of Wedlock.

In the Olympic Games, Greeks ran races, jumped, hurled the biscuits, and threw the java. The reward to the victor was a coral wreath. The government of Athen was democratic because the people took the law into their own hands. There were no wars in Greece, as the mountains were so high that they couldn't climb over to see what their neighbors were doing. When they fought the Parisians, the Greeks were outnumbered because the Persians had more men.

Eventually, the Ramons conquered the Geeks History call people Romans because they never stayed in one place for very long. At Roman banquets, the guests wore garlic in their hair. Julius Caesar extinguished himself on the battle fields of Gaul. The Ides of March killed him because they thought he was going to be made king. Nero was a cruel tyrany who would torture his poor subjects by playing the fiddle to them.

Then came the Middle Ages. King Alfred conquered the Dames, King Arthur lived ln the Age of Shivery, King Harlod mustarded his troops before the Battle of Hastings, Joan of Arc was cannonized by George Bernard Shaw, and the victims of the Black Death grew boobs on their necks Finally, the Magna Carta provided that no free man should be hanged twice for the same offence.

In midevil times most of the people were alliterate. The greatest writer of the time was Chaucer, who wrote many poems and verse and also wrote literature. Another tale tells of William Tell, who shot an arrow through an apple while standing on his son's head.
The Renaissance was an age in which more individuals felt the value of their human being. Martin Luther was nailed to the church door at Wittenberg for selling papal indulgences. He died a horrible death, being excommunicated by a bull. It was the painter Donatello's interest in the female nude that made him the father of the Renaissance. It was an age of great inventions and discoveries. Gutenberg invented the Bible. Sir Walter Raleigh is a historical figure because he invented cigarettes. Another important invention was the circulation of blood. Sir Francis Drake circumcised the world with a 100-foot clipper.

The government of England was a limited mockery. Henry VIII found walking difficult because he had an abbess on his knee. Queen Elizabeth was the "Virgin Queen." As a queen she was a success. When Elizabeth exposed herself before her troops, they all shouted "hurrah." Then her navy went out and defeated the Spanish Armadillo.

The greatest writer of the Renaissance was William Shakespear. Shakespear never made much money and is famous only because of his plays. He lived in Windsor with his merry wives, writing tragedies, comedies and errors. In one of Shakespear's famous plays, Hamlet rations out his situation by relieving himself in a long sololiquy. In another, Lady Macbeth tries to convince Macbeth to kill the King by attacking his manhood, Romeo and Juliet are an expample of a heroic couplet. Writing at the same time as Shakespear was Miquel Cervantes. He wrote "Donkey Hote." The next great author was John Milton. Milton wrote "Paradise Lost." Then his wife dies and he wrote "Paradise Regained."

During the Renaissance America began. Christopher Columbus was a great navigator who discovered America while cursing about the Atlantic. His ships were called the Nina, the Pinta, and the Santa Fe. Later the Pilgrims crossed the Ocean, and that was called the Pilgrim's Progress. When they landed at Plymouth Rock, they were greeted by Indians, who came down the hill rolling their war hoops before them. The Indian squabs carried porposies on their back. Many of the Indian heroes were killed, along with their cabooses, which proved very fatal to them. The winter of 1620 was a hard one for the settlers. Many people died and many babies were born. Captain John Smith was responsible for all this.

One of the causes of the Revolutionary Wars was the English put tacks in their tea. Also, the colonists would send their pacels through the post without stamps. During the War, Red Coats and Paul Revere was throwing balls over stone walls. The dogs were barking and the peacocks crowing. Finally, the colonists won the War and no longer had to pay for taxis.

Delegates from the original thirteen states formed the Contented Congress. Thomas Jefferson, a Virgin, and Benjamin Franklin were two singers of the Declaration of Independence. Franklin had gone to Boston carrying all his clothes in his pocket and a loaf of bread under each arm. He invented electricity by rubbing two cats backwards and declared "a horse divided against itself cannot stand." Franklin died in 1790 and is still dead.

George Washington married Matha Curtis and in due time because the Father of our Country. Them the Constitution of the United States was adopted to secure domestic hostility. Under the Constitution the people enjoyed the right to keep bare arms.

Abraham Lincoln became America's greatest Precedent. Lincoln's mother died in infancy, and he was born in a log cabin which he built with his own hands. When Lincoln was President, he wore only a tall silk hat. He said, "In onion there is strength " Abraham Lincoln write the Gettysburg address while traveling from Washington to Gettysburg on the back of an envelope. He also signed the emasculation proclamation, and the Fourteenth Amendment gave the ex-Negroes citizenship. But the Clue Clux Clan would torcher and lynch the ex-Negroes and other innocent victims. On the night of April 14, 1865, Lincoln went to the theater and got shot in his seat by one of the actors in a moving picture show. This believed assinator was John Wilkes Booth, a supposedly insane actor. This ruined Booth's career.

Meanwhile in Europe, the enlightenment was a reasonable time. Voltare invented electricity and also wrote a book called "Candy." Gravity was invented by Issac Walton. It is chiefly noticeable in the Autumn, when the apples are falling off the trees.

Bach was the most famous composer in the world, and so was Handel. Handel was half German, half Italian and half English. He was very large. Bach died from 1750 to the present. Beethovan wrote music even though he was deaf. He was so deaf he wrote loud music. He took long walks in the forest even when everyone was calling for him. Beethoven expired in 1827 and later died for this.

France was in a very serious state. The French Revolution was accomplished before it happened. The Marseillaise was the theme song of the French Revolution, and it catapulted into Napoleon. During the Napoleonic Wars, the crowned heads of Europe were trembling in their shoes. Then the Spanish gorrilas came down from the hills and nipped at Napoleon's flanks. Napoleon became ill with bladder problems and was very tense and unrestrained. He wanted an heir to inheret his power, but since Josephine was a baroness, she couldn't bear him any children.

The sun never set on the British Empire because the British Empire is in the East and the sun sets in the West. Queen Victoria was the longest queen. She sat on a thorn for 63 years. He reclining years and finally the end of her life were exemplatory of a great personality. Her death was the final event which ended her reign.

The nineteenth century was a time of many great inventions and thoughts. The invention of the steamboat caused a network of rivers to spring up. Cyrus McCormick invented the McCormick Raper, which did the work of a hundred men. Samuel Morse invented a code for telepathy. Louis Pastuer discovered a cure for rabbis. Charles Darwin was a naturalist who wrote the "Organ of the Species." Madman Curie discovered radium. And Karl Marx became one of the Marx Brothers.

The First World War, cause by the assignation of the Arch-Duk by a surf, ushered in a new error in the anals of human history.

Hello ...

What does one mean when they say "hello"?

H = How are you?
E = Everything all right?
L = Like to hear from you.
L = Love to see you soon!
O = Obviously, I miss you...

** Shamelessly copied from a chain-email.

One That Got Away

A test for the EOS-350D. As I was going out this evening for dinner, there was a noise of something moving just 2 meters from where I was standing. At first, I thought it was a cat. I was right, in a way but it was more than that. It was a Civet Cat (Musang)! Ran in to get my camera but I guess it was not comfortable with sudden attention and started to make its way across the balcony to my neighbour's house. Perhaps it was on its way there anyway as one of its favourites was grown next door i.e. Jambu Air (don't know the translation for this fruit).

The neighbour was pretty excited over it as well and welcomed me to try to shoot the picture from his garden. The creature was amongst the leaves and the camera autofocus just could not lock on due to the poor lighting conditions.

Anyway, to cut the story short, it decided it had enough excitement and left the scene via the rooftop. It'll be back.

If I Only Could

If it was within my power, the sun would not have risen today until you had allowed the night to pass.

7 October 1964

That was when I was born. I'm 41 today. How the years fly by without realizing it. No greeting cards but I had a trickling of well wishes from family and friends that made me feel good. It always feels good to be remembered except when you missed a payment with your creditors. A contrast to days of young when birthdays means presents from parents and friends, birthday cakes and feeling delighted with each increase in the number of candles. The thrill of ripping open packages while wondering whether its 'the present' you had wished for. But nothing beats a gift from the special someone you love. It does not matter what it is, it is special, so very special. My special gift this year was a Swiss knife and time with the person who gave it.

42, here I come.

The World As The Lens See It

The itch has become unbearable. The mind is focused on it. Plans have been laid and the game's afoot.... Welcome the Canon EOS-350D.... YEEEESSS!!!!!

I have finally reentered the realm of the SLR (Single Lens Reflex) Camera but no longer with the 35mm film. The realm of digitals have long poised to take over but the price of a digital SLR is still steep although it has come down a long way. My Canon EOS-50 35mm SLR had been long neglected in favour of the digitals i.e. Sony P1 (3MP) and Nikon CP5000 (5MP) but these had limits as for creative & action photography. Only another SLR would be able to fulfill the functionality of an SLR.

Now, to find the space needed to store 8 megapixel pictures :P

Why Bali?!

Saturday 1st, October 2005. Three bombs rocked the peaceful island of Bali, in Jimbaran and Kuta. The people and economy are just beginning to be recover from the senseless and brutal bombing not 2 years ago in the Kuta district. The future of the world looks bleak with man's inhumanity to fellow man.

Having visited Bali earlier this year in May and having emersed in the beautiful and peaceful heritage, my heart cries for the thousands of Balinese who will have to endure further hardship that looms ahead. No tourist means no income to buy food to feed their family.

Shame will befall those that were responsible
The blood of the innocent will burn in their hearts
The cries of hungry children will haunt their dreams
There will be no silence for the curses will howl in their ears
What will they answer when God questions "Why?"

Bali will recover. The people are resilient. The world will not cow to despicable acts of violence. Justice will eventually prevail.

Sometimes Thoughts Land

When least expected, inspiration strikes at the floating thoughts and these are ramblings that could be result:

How treasured are the moments when together in mind.
How wonderful the place when the space is shared.
What wonders will we discover in the mudane.
What mysteries will be uncover amongst the norm.
The infinity of a moment when apart,
and the time that is never enough when together.

Thoughtless action costs others

The Selangor dam is running low on water and the pinch of rising fuel cost is felt by all. So why is it some people think its ok to wash the fence around a construction site? Is there a need to do so? Even if there was, blocking one lane on the Sg. Besi highway and creating a traffic jam on a Sunday morning is damn irritating. So much fuel had been wasted.

A princess is 12 today!

What could you get for a 12 year old? Pondering didn't help. Asking the receiver didn't get the answer either.

Life and more

Appointment for a health screen this morning. Been almost 3 years since my last screen and wonder what else will show up that beckons attention. For one my uric acid levels and cholesterol needs check. While some are concious about looking after their health and well being, there are some that have a deathwish. I had a close encounter with one of those this morning on my way to the medical centre.

This chap took a sharp corner using the opposing traffic lane, and I happened to be the opposing traffic. Unfortunate that he did not get his deathwish as I was going very slow and stopped in time as he slammed his brakes and try to retain control of his bike. He must have changed his mind about the deathwish when he saw that my car was not big nor fast enough to grant him anything more scrapes and bruises. Nonetheless, I was thankful he did not modify my car's shape in any way. As a souvenir for his folly, I rolled my car over his bike tyre when I was pulling away to show what can happen to an object under a car tyre. Stupid blighter and good riddance to him.

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Dato' Dr. Sarvas is such as nice guy. There should be more doctors like him.
Medical report: Some fatty spotting around my liver but ok, heart is in good shape, kidney functioning ok, prostate gland ok, ultrasound scan ok. Chest X-ray not ready yet tho. Triglycerides level not good. Have to cut back on fried stuff. Uphill battle as almost everything here is fried. Uric acid level down but due to the medication I was put on earlier the week i.e. Zyloric 300mg prescribed by Dr. Kamala.
Note: Zyloric tablets contain the active ingredient allopurinol, which is a type of medicine called a xanthine oxidase inhibitor. (NB. Allopurinol tablets are also available without a brand name, ie as the generic medicine allopurinol.) Allopurinol is used to lower uric acid levels in the body.Uric acid is produced by an enzyme in the body called xanthine oxidase. Allopurinol inhibits the action of this enzyme and as a result lowers uric acid levels.
Dato' Dr. Sarvas advised to take it every other day as opposed to daily. According to him, tall people produce more uric acid than the average height person. That would explain why my uric acid levels are so high despite me not eating foods usually associated with gout.

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Youngest princess turns 12 tomorrow but Birthday bash cum BBQ tonight. Which kid will have BBQ when there's pizza and lots of running around to do? Would have been fine with just a pizza party. Less hassle and cheaper.

What's My URL again?

My journal of ramblings, musings, thoughts and what-nots amongst other things. Initially wanted the URL of ShortedNeurons or ShortingNeurons but it was not available. Many thanks to LH who suggested the current one used.